4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
