Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize