you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
