Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
