It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
