Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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