you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
