Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
