i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Dick very happy bro
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize