WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
