Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize