Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
