i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Randomize
