NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
