sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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