Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
