I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
We're too hungover to prance.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
