Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize