drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize