I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Randomize
