consequently i now know what mace tastes like
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
