morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
