I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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