Where are you?
In a non slutty way
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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