there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
