Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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