Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
