If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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