The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
