I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
He kissed a someone with a penis
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
