it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
