The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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