He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I want to make a zoo with you.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
