You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize