after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
