you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
