I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Someone signed my nipple.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize