he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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