I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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