No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
In other news, I just burned my penis
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
