it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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