dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
This is my life. Enjoy the view
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
