Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize