his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
