You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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