apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
