piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
