me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
