Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
