my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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