you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Randomize
